Sunday morning we did “family room church”. This has become the usual thing these days. My older son was not home so it was just the three of us. My younger son likes to sit in the middle and hold my cell phone while we are standing and praising God and while I am trying to read the lyrics to a hymn that I should really know by heart. It becomes increasingly difficult as the heat of the day begins to take effect on us and because my son’s natural posture is not one of quiet contemplation; he is moving back and forth and waving my phone around and giving me “the chicken wing “(picture the elbow rising out from his body in protest as if to say “you can’t have it, mom!” I decide to sway with him rather than fighting it (had I been 10 years younger, I would have swiped it away and offered a negative consequence..but as I have aged, I have absorbed other moms’ words of “pick your battles”…so I chose to sway. Too bad it wasn’t a Spiritual). Next week I may take the time to print out the words to the music and have peace on top of God-given peace.
I was blessed by having both of my sons home for Father’s Day this year and that it was hot enough for my husband ,who has heart failure, to get into the pool with the boys and actually lightly clown around for a while. I loved seeing my older son interacting with my younger one whom I previously blogged about. He is so gentle with him and yet entirely capable of providing the “roughhousing ” experience simultaneously . I loved watching the interaction: spinning on the floating donut, tipping it over gently with fair warning (“one..two..threeee!”) and the laughter and smiles that followed . I watched my unwell husband’s face light up a little…so intensely heartwarming for me ..so rare these days…but there is was: a little smile! He had made an effort to blow up the pool toys so that the boys could interact and have fun..and so that he himself could be a part of it. I watched him get in the water and tag onto what seemed like a water parade (yep, I joined in too, then my husband) and then all of a sudden the parade stopped (maybe we were getting a little tired?) and what followed was another extreme rarity: a real family hug! I didn’t want to let go..The sun was shining on us, and we were physically connected; it felt GREAT for a change. It made all the difference when big brother was home..just for dinner and a swim( his exam is coming soon) but also to give my husband the nicest Father’s Day card. Words of affirmation are his love language don’t you know! This card hit the bullseye, praise the Lord. Just what he needed. When the day was over and it was time for Christopher to leave (that’s big brother :)) , just like other families, we all managed to go out on the driveway and “wave him off” (as my recently departed British mother would have said). Later, Sunday evening ,when I was helping my younger son (he is called Timothy) with his shower and other self-care things like shaving, he tried in his own way to ask about following his brother: “Timothy goes to apartment”. I told him that I hope one day that he will have his own(shared living?) apartment. I hope that he may get to live in a wonderful group home someday. I think he missed his brother after he left. Hard to know for sure..but a mom can have an inkling.
After thought: you know you are getting older when you forget to give your husband the main gift that you sent away for, that he has been asking for (very indirectly ) and realize it on Monday morning! Insert palm slapping face emoji right about here.
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